SEX
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Sex is how we resemble God. Really! It's in the Bible. Specifically Genesis 1:27. I Quote:
"God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female..."
Consider:
The devil, the Father of Lies, mankind's most ancient enemy, has obviously thought about it a lot. As an angel himself, he's obviously jealous. He hates and fears our special likeness to God, which surpasses even that of the angels. From the very beginning of our species, he has unceasingly attacked our sexuality on every front with his only weapon, the Big Lie. There are actually three Big Lies. They are so blatant, so transparent, so obviously false, it is a wonder that anyone would take them seriously, yet virtually every human being in history has bought into them. They are:
Christianity is still suffering from the licentious youth of Saint Augustine of Hippo. A rake and rambling boy, Auggie converted to Christianity late in life and eventually became a famous bishop. He was considered by some to have been at his death the holiest man in all Christendom. He did a complete about face on the subject of sex. From a lifestyle that valued sex only for pleasure, he later believed and taught that sex was only for reproduction, and that any pleasure in it was essentially sinful. Christians are still lugging around this misleading doctrinal baggage.
Catholic Christians bear the additional burden of a celibate clergy and a body of faith which considers Mary the Mother of God to have been always a virgin. Hearing a Catholic clergyman talk about sex is like hearing a diabetic talk about pecan pie. The few good things they are likely to say about it don't really ring true. The belief in the superiority of consecrated virginity as a greater good leads to the natural (but wrong) conclusion that there is something basically wrong with the other thing. But the teaching of the Catholic Church (as opposed to the opinions of some misguided Catholic teachers) is that human sexuality, established by God, is good, holy, fun, and an intrinsic aid to salvation.
In its discussion of the love between husband and wife, the Catechism of the Catholic Church quotes St. John Chrysostom, one of our more romantic theologians. He made a valiant, if somewhat stuffy, effort to express the Church's position:
"I have taken you in my arms, and I love you, and I prefer you to my life itself. For the present life is nothing, and my most ardent dream is to spend it with you in such a way that we may be assured of not being separated in the life reserved for us.... I place your love above all things, and nothing would be more bitter or painful to me than to be of a different mind than you."Nice try, Johnny!
My limited observation of Judaism indicates that Jews have the healthiest attitude toward sex. Sexual activity of all kinds is discussed pretty freely in the Old Testament, and the Song of Solomon or Shir HaShirim is blatantly erotic. Fully thirty percent of the Ten Commandments have to do with sexual or family relationships. Perhaps it is a demonstration of God's concern for his People that their theology has been so resistant to the influence of dark powers.
Because sex is fundamental to the very survival of our species, sexual perversion threatens not only the survival of individuals, but the very existence of the human race. Any sins involving sex are therefore likely to be most serious. The Church teaches that sexual sins; adultery, fornication, rape, incest, child molestation, homosexual acts and any interruption of the normal transmission of life are mortal, what 1 John 5:16 calls a sin "unto death," that is so serious that it completely deprives the sinner of spiritual life. Even the entertained desire to commit such a sin is itself sinful. Of course, sin is committed in the will of the sinner, but these acts are objectively evil in themselves. The Church rejects utterly the idea that they are just natural activities, or that sex is essentially recreation, as if human beings were merely so many rutting animals. She maintains that the function of the human intellect is to control the outlet of human passion and that, with the help of supernatural grace, humans can and, indeed must, use their sexual faculties for their intended purpose, the expression of love and commitment between husband and wife which culminates in the begetting and raising of their children. All the "thou shalts" and "thou shalt nots" add up to this: "Have all the sex you want, but only with someone you're married to." It's very simple, really:
"Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth." [Genesis 1:28]Sex is something like (but much better than) eating. Eating is good for you; it's fun and nourishes our bodies. Sex is good for you; it's fun and propagates our species. Hunger is good because it encourages us to eat. Sexual attraction is good because it encourages us to reproduce. The reason food is attractive is so we will want to eat it. The reason prospective sexual partners are attractive is so we will want to have sex with them. Eating inappropriate things is bad for you. Having sex with inappropriate people is bad for you. No-cal food perverts the purpose of eating. No-love sex perverts the purpose of sexual activity. Anything which prevents eating from nourishing a person is bad. Anything that prevents sexual activity from creating new persons is bad. Poison is bad for you. Pornography is bad for you. A healthy appetite is a good thing. A healthy attraction for the opposite sex is a good thing. There are some circumstances in which it is better to fast than to eat. There are some circumstances in which it is better to abstain than to have sex. Gluttony is a deadly sin related to perverted eating. Lust is a deadly sin related to perverted sex. Gluttony is epidemic in our society. So is lust. So it goes.
Because of you there's a song in my heart.In the normal course of things, human beings are conceived, gestated, born, and spend about half their natural life as juveniles. They grow in wisdom, strength, ability, and power by role playing. They imitate and learn from their parents and other adults. When they reach childbearing age themselves, they become propagators, taking an interest in the opposite gender and spending much of their time in elaborate courtship rituals. They form bonds of increasing strength and intimacy which culminate in the formation of permanent sexual pair bonds. These are sustained and strengthened by love and sexual activity which are biologically oriented toward the creation and nurturing of new children. The fathers work, hunt, ranch, gather and farm to support the immature children and mothers immobilized by childbearing.
Because of you my romance had its start.
Because of you the sun will shine;
The moon and stars will say you're mine;
Forever and never to part.I only live for your love and your kiss.
It's paradise to be near you like this.
Because of you my life is now worthwhile;
And I can smile
Because of you.- Arthur Hammerstein and Dudley Wilkinson, "Because of You"
If they are healthy and fortunate, parents survive to become grandparents, protectors of their adult children and their offspring, who in turn reward them with love, companionship, honor, respect, and a well-deserved sense of fulfillment and self-worth in their old age. Intimacy, sexual and otherwise, after the childbearing years remains an expression of love, companionship and commitment to their spouses, a source of comfort and inspiration to their children and grandchildren, and a means to keep life interesting and happy and to delay or prevent entirely the onset of senility.
You must remember this; a kiss is just a kiss, a sigh is just a sigh.The Big Lies say that this is not how things should be. There are pills and jellies and creams and drugs and mechanical devices and surgical procedures that prevent ejaculation or ovulation or fertilization or implantation or survival of the unborn child. The most fearsome predator of unborn human children throughout the world is the human gynecologist. Our population is getting older and the children who have managed to survive are becoming more and more burdened by old people who have failed in their responsibility to provide society with new and productive citizens. Medicare is in trouble. Social security is going bankrupt. There is a shortage of (former child) medical and nursing students and a surfeit of old people requiring their care. (Click here to see the demographic projection for the United States.) We now have two whole generations of adults who are battling chronic obesity because their mothers didn't nurse them properly (or at all!) and who haven't a clue about healthy family relationships. The times they are a-changing, but woe betide any politician or religious leader who even suggests that the solution is to get back to basics and encourage real family values.
The fundamental things apply as time goes by.And when two lovers woo, they still say, "I love you," on that you can rely,
No matter what the future brings as time goes by.Moonlight and love songs, never out of date.
Hearts full of passion, jealousy and hate.
Woman needs man, and man must have his mate, that no one can deny.It's still the same old story, a fight for love and glory, a case of do or die.
The world will always welcome lovers, as time goes by.- Herman Hupfeld, "As Time Goes By"
The Big Lies also say that juveniles, propagators and protectors should be other than what they are. Children are encouraged to participate in sex play and actual sexual activity before they are ready, or even interested. There are "beauty" or "talent" contests in which little girls, even preschoolers, are dressed up like little hookers and made to "perform" before male judges. Having sex is encouraged as part of the courtship ritual, and is widely supposed to make one an adult. There are all sorts of "adult" publications which pander only to prurient interests, mostly of men. Girls who "do it" are very popular, even if few men want actually to marry one. Boys are quick to deny responsibility for a pregnant girlfriend, but they are even quicker to take the "credit" from their admiring peers. A juvenile mother is regarded in many cases as something of a celebrity, and even the other girls who make fun of her behind her back pretend to be her friends for the status it entails.
When they actually reach puberty, there is an abrupt change in the Big Lies. Now they counsel the propagators not to settle down and make commitments and have children and show a profit for the investment that their parents and society have made in them. They are encouraged to wait, to stay in school, to get an education, to have fun, to get established, to become secure, and to buy, spend, and consume. Children are expensive. Don't have them. Buy a new house. Buy a new car. Buy jewelry, expensive clothes, riding lawn mowers. Buy toys. Buy a second house. Buy a second car. Get more stuff. Pay off your college loans. Live the American Dream. Don't stay at home and be a despised "soccer mom." Get a job. Have a career. Realize your potential. Make something of yourself. Don't be a slave to your husband. Don't be tied down to a non-working wife. Be irresponsible. Play. Indulge yourself. You deserve "the good life." He who dies with the most toys wins!
You've bought belly button brushes, and toothpicks made of gold,At an age when old people should have fulfilled their natural biological destiny and actually have a chance to finalize their lifetime self-actualization, they are encouraged to act like youngsters. Of course, more and more old people are having to depend on their own resources because they don't have children to love them and take care of them, so some of the problem is historical. Still, the Big Lies claim that there is something wrong with getting old, even considering the alternative. Sexuality for the elderly is the subject of jokes and ridicule, yet one need only open his e-mail box to see all sorts of hype for dangerous drugs that can make a bowl of pudding stand at attention and punch holes in a marble statue. When the time is right, will you be ready? Thanks, Viagra. Thanks, Cialis.
And you're still buying diapers, and our kid is twelve years old.
You've got so many dresses, one for every day.
You don't clean them when they're dirty, you throw them away.The closets are all filled up, so we put things on the floor
Our house is filled with so much stuff that we can't close the door.
We've got cartons full of calendars from 1933.
Pretty soon there won't be room enough for you and me!
Why do you buy, buy, buy? That all you want to do.
When you leave the house I get the chills!
You always buy, buy, buy, that's all you ever do.
You do all the buying, honey, I get all the bills.- Sam Allred and Dewayne Smith (The Geezinslaw Brothers), "Buy, Buy, Buy"
I've been around long enough to see a lot of these bad things happen. As a teenager, I recall that girls were soft and cuddly and about two degrees warmer than the rest of us and had no bones. They wore tight, furry cashmere sweaters and collars of real fur that made them soft and cuddly even with their clothes on, while boldly advertising the fact that they were functional adult female mammals. They always smelled like lilacs or baby powder and smiled a lot and their poodle skirts and ponytails and petticoats swished when they walked, while the rest of them jiggled delightfully. Their clothing was not only esthetically pleasing, it served as a means of social communication. "I can make your wildest fantasies come true!" Girls were wonderful, and we guys used to do everything we could think of to gain their attention and approval.
- Byron Douglas Stokes, "The Sweetheart of Sigma Chi"
Most of us normal, healthy adolescents were strongly under the influence of the command to be fruitful and multiply. While there were some perverts who just wanted to "do it" with anyone (or, sometimes, with themselves, farm animals or inanimate objects), most of us guys liked affectionate girls and had romantic fantasies (and dreams) about them and wanted to hug them and kiss them and touch them and fondle them and stroke them and pet them and buy them presents we couldn't afford and do manly and sometimes dangerous things to win their affection and admiration.
They seemed to like that!
Kiss me once again before we say good night.
When I'm in your arms you give my heart a treat.
- Bill Norvas, Allan Copeland, Leon Rappolo, Paul Mares, Ben Pollack, George Brunies, Mel Stitzel and Walter Melrose; "Make Love To Me"
There were "easy" girls, but few guys actually liked them, and they tended to drop out of school a lot to go live with their grandparents in another state. They were usually incredibly boorish or butt ugly. I don't know anyone who ever married one, except I guy I know who "went all the way" with one and stupidly bragged about it shortly before she announced that she was pregnant. We all (including the girls) knew girls got pregnant, which was what their basic functions were for, and if you got a girl you weren't married to pregnant, it was because you were a low-life creep who didn't follow the rules, or she was a slut who allegedly deserved what she got. Worthwhile guys knew who the sluts were and let the low-life creeps have them. Kind of a balance of nature thing.
The priests and nuns in Catholic school were rightly concerned about our ability to identify the easy girls and low-life creeps. They knew we didn't need any encouragement toward love and tenderness; that was built in and fully operational. So they grossly, and, in my view, inappropriately, overemphasized the "thou shalt nots." This left many of us confused as to what was and was not permitted. My view, based on over half a century of intense observation, is that one crosses the line if one has sex with something or someone to whom he or she is not married, regardless of the reason. We learned that in the Army.
Eventually most boys and girls found partners they liked for other reasons, and supplemented sexual passion with shared interests and attitudes and a desire to be the parents of each other's children. Marriage was seen not only as license to "do it" as much as you wanted, but to be forever united in love and devotion with the person you wanted most to "do it" with. Marriage was for keeps, and children were considered a means of making little copies of yourselves and your one true love. Divorce was considered a tragedy, and husbands who didn't take care of their wives and children, even if they were divorced, were in danger of losing their friends, golfing buddies and jobs as well. Nobody liked an irresponsible asshole who didn't keep his promises.
The girl of my dreams is the sweetest girl of all the girls I know.
Girls with little pins on the points of their sweaters or class rings wrapped with tape on their hands were "going steady," and cool guys didn't mess with them. Those without the pins or rings were available for romantic encounters. If we were interested in someone else's "steady," we waited until she "broke up" with her current boyfriend, signified by giving back his pin or ring, at which time she became fair game. It usually didn't take too long in high school, somewhat longer in college. You courted a girl by asking her to a dance or to the malt shop. There were even movies shown in school to teach those of us who grew up while dad was fighting the war and mom was working in the aircraft factory how to do this, and how the girl should respond. There was a formula for telling the girl how much you liked her, where you wanted to go, how much you could afford to spend on her, and, if you were feeling especially lucky, how far you were hoping to get. (The school films didn't teach us that, but we found out anyway!) The girl used a similar formula to tell you whether or not she was interested, what alternatives were available, and how far she was likely to let you go. As I said, girls were wonderful!
Each sweet co-ed, like a rainbow trail, fades in the after glow .
The blue of her eyes and the gold of her hair
Are a blend of the western sky.
And the moonlight beams on the girl of my dreams;
She's the Sweetheart of Sigma Chi.
Take me in your arms and never let me go.
Our raging hormones were kept in check by social pressure. You could cuddle and grope as much as you wanted on the dance floor, because dances were supervised affairs and everyone kept all their clothes on, except occasionally for their shoes. The other stuff happened in cars or closets, within shouting range of help if it should become necessary. We played the game in which everybody followed the rules and knew how to keep score. You tried stuff as long as the girl didn't resist, although she wasn't officially required to cooperate or make things easy. But as soon as she said "stop" or "no," or moved away, you stopped, because "no" meant "NO" and otherwise she'd start screaming. Every red-blooded teenage boy within earshot would come to the immediate and violent defense of her honor, after which she was expected to reward them with the sight of feminine underthings and, if she had really been in trouble, a quick glimpse or two of a pubescent nipple. The limits were always imposed by the girl, and a boy could feel comfortable knowing that nothing he couldn't back away from was going to happen as long as he played by the rules, because his part of the game was to see how far he could get and the girl's function was to determine what that was.
Whisper to me softly while the moon is low.
Hold me close and tell me what I wanna know.
Say it to me gently, let the sweet talk flow.
Come a little closer, make love to me!
Take me in your lovin' arms and squeeze me tight.
Put me in a mood so I can dream all night.
Everybody's sleepin' so it's quite all right.
Come a little closer, make love to me!
Everything about you is so doggone sweet.
Ev'ry time we kiss you make my life complete.
Baby doll, ya know ya swept me off my feet.
Now's the time to tell you, make love to me!
In 1960, Frank B. Colton made oral contraceptives (Enovid, patent #2,691,028 and 2,725,389) available to the public, and everything changed!
The marketing of contraceptives of all types was the ultimate expression of the Big Lies. It claimed that getting pregnant as the result of sex was bad (Big Lie #1), people, especially teenagers, should have sex as often and with whomever (or whatever!) they wanted (Big Lie #2), and that all this sexual activity would make everyone happier (Big Lie #3). Suddenly people who couldn't even stand each other otherwise were copulating like minks, secure in the belief that technology had finally overcome morality and that the warnings of the oldsters about the evils of fornication, adultery and even more disgusting stuff were nothing more than old hog farts!
There's a gonna be some changes made right here on nursery hillWithin a decade, morality, family values and respect for human dignity, sexuality and the opposite gender had vanished and herpes transmission had become a major health concern. Within two decades, abortion had not only become legal, in the United States it had become immune from government regulation, and a new, incurable sexually transmitted disease, AIDS, had become epidemic around the world. Within three decades, more people were getting divorced than were staying married, and within four decades more people had been killed by abortion (527-836 million) than during the entire preceding century by war (214-258 million) and smallpox (300-500 million) combined! That's close to the human population of the entire world in 1776!
You've set this chicken your last time 'cause now I've got the pill
This old maternity dress I've got is goin' in the garbage
The clothes I'm wearin' from now on won't take up so much yardage
Miniskirts, hot pants and a few little fancy frills
Yeah I'm makin' up for all those years, since I've got the pill!I'm tired of all your crowin' how you and your hens play
While holdin' a couple in my arms another's on the way
This chicken's done tore up her nest, and I'm ready to make a deal
And ya can't afford to turn it down, 'cause you know I've got the pill
This incubator is overused, because you've kept it filled
The feelin' good comes easy now since I've got the pill
It's gettin' dark it's roostin' time; tonight's too good to be real
Oh but daddy don't you worry none, 'cause mama's got the pill!- Loretta Lynn, "The Pill"
During that same time, the number of living human beings more than doubled. Even in their intended purpose of population control, artificial contraceptives were a miserable failure!
Far from "taking control of their reproductive destiny" (a favorite mantra), the women had surrendered control of their reproductive destiny to G.D. Searle & Co at the cost of $5.00 per day, the entire income for some women. They put up with nausea, weight gain, bloating, cramps, uterine cancer and sometimes death in exchange for the ability to be treated like walking sperm banks by self-serving men they frequently didn't even know. By the next generation from mine, the warm, cuddly, sweetly-scented maidens in the furry sweaters were gone, replaced by smelly, unwashed hippies who were sometimes so stoned on dangerous drugs and other substances they didn't even know when they were being impregnated and infected by gangs of smarmy males too lazy to play with themselves. You can see their children and grandchildren in today's high schools, slouching around in ratty, ill-fitting, raggedy, "easy off" hobo outfits that advertise that they're not only easy, they're cheap as well. Unlike the Paris styles of three generations ago, Americans now follow trends established by some starving whore in Bangladesh! The height of fashion nowadays is to look like a lower class New Orleans vagrant! They hate themselves so much they pass on fatal diseases to each other, poison themselves with deadly chemicals, mutilate themselves with cheap hardware and tattoos (or just cut their arms and legs), allow themselves to become disgustingly obese or fatally thin, and drop out of school so they can spend a lifetime feeling sorry for themselves because they can't get a decent job. It is illegal to do to a dumb animal what American singles do to themselves! Nowadays they are so repulsive they have turned dancing into some kind of individualized gymnastic exercise, and have to take expensive and dangerous drugs even to find each other sexually attractive.
And the horrible things they are doing to any children they accidentally conceive go far beyond anything Stephen King or Wes Craven imagined! They're murdering over 40-50 million of them per year!
No wonder they treat each other like dogs!
When they said you was high classed, well, that was just a lie.
- Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller, "Hound Dog"
You ain't nothin' but a hound dog, cryin' all the time.
The Catholic Church, true to its mandate to preach truth and morality, reacted to the replacement of nature with technology with clear messages about what was and was not a part of the Divine Plan. Pope Paul VI, who found himself in the middle of this revolution, published the encyclical "Humanae Vitae" on July 25th, 1968, warning about the evil consequences of artificial birth control. He claimed that the use of other than natural means to regulate childbearing would, among other things, "open wide the way for marital infidelity," lead to "a general lowering of moral standards," cause men to "forget the reverence due to a woman," and "reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection."
You ain't nothin' but a hound dog, cryin' all the time.
Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit
And you ain't no friend of mine.
When they said you was high classed, well, that was just a lie.
You ain't never caught a rabbit
And you ain't no friend of mine!
Like he was looking in a crystal ball!
Your cheatin' heart will make you weep.This encyclical was followed by the pastoral letter, "Human Life in Our Day," from the American Catholic Hierarchy in November 15, 1968, and a further Vatican declaration on certain questions concerning sexual ethics, "Persona Humana," in 1975. Both of these documents affirmed the dignity of human sexuality and human life, and the seriousness of disrespect of either.
You'll cry and cry, and try to sleep.
But sleep won't come the whole night through;
Your cheatin' heart, will tell on you...Your cheatin' heart will pine some day.
And crave the love you threw away.
The time will come when you'll be blue;
Your cheatin' heart will tell on you...
When tears come down like falling rain,
You'll toss around and call my name.
You'll walk the floor, the way I do.
Your cheatin' heart, will tell on you...- Hank Williams, "Your Cheatin' Heart"
The Church was not only repudiated, it was ridiculed. It was criticized for "adding to the population explosion" by advocating that people should have as many children as possible, which is almost exactly the opposite of what it did say. The most complimentary picture of Pope Paul was that of a senile old man shaking his finger and saying, "The pill is a no-no." But few young people believed that. Armed with drugs and mechanical devices that made them temporarily sterile (among other things), women found a new sense of self-identity in the workplaces that their mothers had occupied as a necessary wartime evil. Women now had the option to forego childbearing to go out and compete with the men to earn the money that they needed to buy the pills that enabled them to do that, and damn the side effects. Merchants and manufacturers were happy to accommodate their consumer instincts by convincing them that making a living rather than a home was "the modern thing."
Today, the grandchildren of women (and men) who found lifetime satisfaction in a home and family are making their bloodlines extinct because two-person incomes have become a necessity instead of an option. Even if they want to have children, married women still have to go out and work to make ends meet while strangers raise their babies in preschools and day care centers. Sometimes, that's just not possible. Teenage girls, whose natural destiny to become beloved wives and mothers is being frustrated by their own society, are reacting in truly bizarre ways, all of which are symptoms of self loathing and self-hatred! Besides disfiguring their bodies with cheap tattoos, keloid scars and sleazy hardware, they binge and purge, and seek out relationships with men who fulfill their desire to be punished by beating them, treating them like crap, torturing them, and even murdering them! They have perverted Nature, and Nature is reacting predictably by removing them permanently from the gene pool, just like Charles Darwin described!
You've come a long way, baby!
You came a long way from St. Louis,The Church teaches that human sexuality influences everything that people do, and finds its most sublime expression in the natural, God-given institution of marriage. Fortunately for those married couples who don't want to have children all the time, human females are usually infertile. Any science that can figure out how to frustrate fertility is certainly capable of letting people who need to know when it occurs in the first place. Marriage is not only for having children. But the Church sees marriage as God's plan for mankind's happiness and survival, a lifetime physical and social union of a man and a woman in which they dedicate themselves to each other and lovingly give themselves to each other in sexual activity, the natural (but not only) purpose of which is the blessing of children raised in a loving and stable family. Anything that threatens the social, biological or moral status of marriage she rightly condemns.
You climbed the ladder of success;
I've seen the town and country cars
That were parked out in front of your fancy address.You came a long way from St. Louis;
You broke a lot of hearts between.
I've seen a gang of gloomy guys
Who were doin' all right 'til you came on the scene.You came here from the middle West,
And certainly impressed the population hereabouts;
Well, baby, I got news for you,
I'm from Missouri, too, so natcherly, I got my doubts!You got 'em droppin' by the wayside,
A feelin' I ain't gonna know;
You came a long way from St. Louis,
But, Baby, you still got a long way to go.- Bob Russell, "You Came A Long Way From St. Louis"
The Big Lies are diametrically, and violently, opposed to the Truth the Church teaches. They keep getting more and more outrageous, as if embellishment and retelling might somehow make them true. The current pandemic of STDs is the natural, sorry result. The Church has always believed and taught that one should have sex only with one to whom he or she is married. Obviously, it you only have sex with someone who has only had sex with you, you're not going to get or transmit any sexually transmitted diseases. Yet the latest Big Lie is that the Catholic Church is causing the spread of STDs by forbidding contraception (as if anyone is listening nowadays) because supposedly STDs are spread only by people who don't take contraceptives. If that were true, all nuns would have them. Even the contraceptive packaging warns users that they do not prevent the spread of STD's, but you can't talk sense with the Big Liars.
As one who has achieved independence from the demands of political correctness, I owe no allegiance whatever to the Big Lies. I stand foursquare behind the teachings of my Church, not only because it teaches them, but because I know from experience and observation that they are true. I don't have to pretend that there is something wrong with getting old or that sexual attraction is dirty or that one's manliness is measured by how many women he has had sex with or that divorce and remarriage is the way things ought to be or that women and men are the same or that homosexuality is just another lifestyle. I may have to tolerate them as fellow members of society, but I don't have to pretend that I agree with them just because they are in the majority and I'm not.
Fact is, I like women; no, I love women. I think women are the most wonderful people there are in the whole world; much more so than I did in high school. It offends me to see any of them profane themselves by being unhealthy fat or thin, or by dressing or behaving inappropriately in public. I have traveled enough to know that they come in a marvelous diversity: licorice, chocolate, caramel, vanilla, peach, strawberry cream, lemon mocha and raspberry toffee. I love them all!
Ain't she sweet?One has only to open a magazine or one's e-mail to know that there are many male senior citizens in whom the biological imperative to be fruitful and multiply is still going strong. It's not hard to understand why. Male sexuality peaks in the middle teens. As the hunters, gathers and explorers of our species, we are naturally at high risk of violent death as soon as we are old enough to go hunting. Evolution has shaped us to have as much sex as soon as possible to insure our role in the continuation of the species. On the other hand, there is evolutionary interest in those of us who have survived to mature years passing on to future generations whatever physical characteristics have helped us to do that. The whole species benefits from reproducing oldsters who have been there and done that and have the survival tee shirt to prove it.
See her coming down the street!
Now I ask you very confidentially,
Ain't she sweet?Ain't she nice?
Look her over once or twice
Now I ask you very confidentially,
Ain't she nice?Just cast an eye in her direction
Oh, me! Oh, my!
Ain't that perfection?I repeat;
Don't you think that's kind of neat?
And I ask you very confidentially,
Ain't she sweet?- Jack Yellen, "Ain't She Sweet?"
The ladies are different. I don't have any direct knowledge, of course, but my observations and experience indicate that the girls are just as interested in being fruitful and multiplying as the boys are, even after investing the time and effort of having had one or more fruits before. But the ladies' sexual interest peaks in middle age, just before they run out of eggs, when it's literally their last chance to contribute to the gene pool. After that, they spend their waning years insuring the reproductive success of their children by defending the survival of their grandchildren. Most women my age that I know tend to be attracted to mature men for the comfort, companionship, stability and security which we financially independent geezers can hopefully provide. They can then continue their evolutionary contribution by defending their step-grandchildren, and that's OK for them.
Oh, my love, my darling,I am probably reasonably representative of my age group. If I would have had the opportunity to grow old with my late spouse, I would probably still be strongly attracted to her or to a reasonable facsimile thereof after she died. My dad was to my mom, and later to my stepmother. Our biological imperatives are the same as they were way back when. Of course, our days of being fruitful and multiplying are mostly over; old age does that! But the programming is still there, and we oldsters can still contribute to the survival of our species by caring for women generally in other ways.
I've hungered for your touch a long, lonely time,
Time goes by so slowly and time can do so much.
Are you still mine?
I need your love, I need your love, God speed your love to me.Lonely rivers flow to the sea, to the sea
To the open arms of the sea
Lonely rivers sigh, "Wait for me, wait for me"
I'll be coming home, wait for me
- The Righteous Brothers, "Unchained Melody"
Imagine a former boy scout, trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean and reverent, physically strong, mentally awake and morally straight, one who is romantic, affectionate, healthy, stable and free of contagious diseases, a devout, sincere, devoted, responsible, compassionate and disciplined adherent to his religion. Imagine one who don't drink, smoke, chew, gamble or do drugs, a retired army officer, engineer and single parent, one who has proved his ability to do his duty, overcome obstacles, solve problems, and provide for his family, 100% pure true love, with no chemicals or artificial ingredients, and total, guaranteed lifetime commitment. Some of us are still around!
I'll be loving you always, with a love that's true, always.Unfortunately, this is a limited time offer. By the time some of the ladies I am interested in get to be my age, I plan to be dead!
When the thing you've planned needs my helping hand,
I will understand, always, always.Days may not be fair, always, That's when I'll be there, always;
Not for just an hour, not for just a day,
Not for just a year, but always.- Irving Berlin, "Always"
The ladies, God bless 'em, aren't buying it. Their biological imperative tells them that men like me have a low probability of being around to raise their babies to maturity, even if they're not planning on having any. They know intuitively that we're never as good as we once were, even if we're as good once as we ever were. I probably don't have the right pheromones or body language or something. So much for us geeky old guys. The young ladies seem instinctively to be looking for equally young studs yearning to deflower whole forests of virgins, who advertise their machismo by riding fast motorcycles and shooting defenseless animals. They like heavy drinking and other guy stuff with their buds. How the ladies cope, once they are pregnant, with the biker conventions, hunting trips, drunken episodes and the ongoing deflowering of other virgins seems to me to be one of their many problems.
Bessie was a lovely child from West Tennessee.My late wife is a case in point. Having unilaterally decided to ignore the Church's teaching on artificial birth control, she decided to get herself "fixed" after our fourth child. ("Fixed" being the Big Lie for "irreparably damaged.") Predictably, her biological imperative went haywire and she left me because, according to her, she "didn't need a man." Three months later, she was embezzling our kids' child support money to subsidize a drug-dealing drifter who flaunted his manhood by getting wasted once a week, killing wild animals by running into them with his pickup truck, and regularly beating her senseless. She finally abandoned the children, took what little money he let her keep, and bought a revolver with just enough ammunition to blow her brains out. Some time later the boyfriend was murdered when one of his drug deals went bad. Not much survival value there!
Leroy was an outlaw, hard-eyed and mean.
One day she saw him staring and it chilled her to the bone.
And she knew she had to see that look on a child of her own!Linda was a lady, blonde and built to last.
Benny was a no good guitar picker, running from his past.
She heard all his songs telling nothing but bad news.
But she made her mind up to try to get him win or lose!Jessie liked her Cadillacs and diamonds on her hands.
Waymore had a reputation as a ladies' man.
Late one night her light of love finally gave a sign.
Jessie parked her Cadillac and took her place in line!'Cause ladies love outlaws,
Like babies love stray dogs.
Ladies touch babies like a banker touches gold;
Outlaws touch ladies somewhere deep down in their soul!- Lee Clayton, "Ladies Love Outlaws"
I'm gonna buy a paper doll that I can call my own,We old guys have our faults. We don't have much fashion sense and don't really care what the majority thinks. Most of us are poor housekeepers. We tend to be stubborn, determined and inflexible in things we consider important. Having had a long time to form our opinions, we tend to be strongly attached to them. We sometimes can be convinced otherwise, but only by valid arguments. Some people say this makes us opinionated. Those of us who have made disastrous romantic mistake tend to be wary of making another. Maybe we don't have that much time.
A doll that other fellows cannot steal.
And then the flirty, flirty guys with their flirty, flirty eyes
Will have to flirt with dollies that are real.When I come home at night she will be waiting.
She'll be the truest doll in all this world.
I'd rather have a paper doll to call my own,
Than have a fickle-hearted real live girl.- Johnny S. Black, "Paper Doll"
Come to me, my melancholy babyAs a Catholic, I agree with the Church that marriage is a natural lifetime commitment of love, honor and respect, totally unaffected by attempts by man-made laws, courts or judges to redefine it, change it, or tear it asunder. It has a private aspect, requiring the free consent of both parties. It has a social aspect which requires it to be publicly recognizable to be valid. People get married by formal ceremonies or exchanging vows privately before a judge or a minister, but they also get married by jumping over a broom, bearing witness before their congregations or promising to be each other's teddy bears and not be cruel before an official who looks like Elvis. However one gets married, the Church maintains that marriage between Christians (not just Catholics) is an absolutely unbreakable bond during their mutual lifetime, and repudiates any argument that civil divorce constitutes any kind of unmarriage. I think this makes sense. I have never heard of a divorced couple being able to raise their children as well as if they were still happily married.
Cuddle up and don't be blue
All your fears are foolish fancies, maybe
You know, honey, I'm in love with youEvery cloud must have a silver lining
Just wait until the sun shines through
Smile, my honey dear, while I kiss away each tear
Or else I shall be melancholy too- George A. Norton, "My Melancholy Baby"
Love hurts!Of course, there are all sorts of cases in which husbands and wives find it impossible to live together, and civil authority rightly provides for equitable distribution of property and individual rights in such cases. But civil authority has no control over marriage itself any more than it does over love. Marriage is a divine institution, regardless of what legislators or judges think or attempt to impose on others.
Love scars!
Love wounds!
Love mars
Any heart
Not tough
Or strong enough
To take a lot of pain,
Take a lot of pain -
Love is like a cloud;
Holds a lot of rain!
Love hurts!
Oh, ooooooh; Love hurts!- Don and Phil, the Everly Brothers, "Love Hurts."
What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. [Matthew 19:6]In the Catholic Church, an annulment (actually, a "declaration of nullity") is a simple finding of fact, after careful investigation, that a purported marriage in fact never took place. Like any competent investigation, it costs money, sometimes a lot. But the money is for the cost of the investigation, not to influence the finding. It is fundamentally different from divorce. The parties involved may not have freely consented to the union (in a "shotgun wedding," for example). One or both parties may have materially deceived the other so that true consent of the other party was not possible. One or both parties may not have been free to marry in the first place (perhaps because they were already married to someone else from whom they had been divorced). Whatever the reason, the Church teaches that someone who has a surviving spouse (divorce for whatever legitimate reason notwithstanding) unless he or she has been granted an annulment from the purported marriage, or unless the "former" spouse dies, is "off limits."
Which does not mean, that they cannot be attractive, or that, as neighbors, the rest of us should not love them!
"But I say unto you, ... whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." [Matthew 5:32, 19:9; Mark 10:11; Luke 16:18]Many of my friends have tried to fix me up with divorced older ladies in the belief that simply because we are of similar age but opposite gender, things are going to start happening. That may be true for chimpanzees, orangutans, bonobos and gorillas, but I am interested in members of only my own species. My feeling is that two people are compatible if the chemistry is right, when each sees in the other what he or she is looking for, regardless of what that happens to be, and that the two have enough in common to be able to communicate positively to each other. Anything else is either friendship, companionship or animal husbandry.
I've been out with Johnny Ridge, George Dickle never failed.Most ladies my age and I have many things in common, including the shared experiences of similarity of age. A lot of them are charming, attractive, sexy, friendly and married. I enjoy their company and am a better person for their friendship and the opportunity to share their interests. My internist and dentist and many of the people with whom I do business are women. The ladies bring to their professional practice of the healing arts their natural abilities as the caregivers, comforters and nurturers of our species. If somebody takes care of me when I'm sick or hurt, I want it to be someone like my mommy! But, absent an annulment from the Church, I assume that anyone who claims to be divorced is actually somebody's spouse. Anything more than shared interests, however otherwise romantic, just ain't gonna happen!
I've taken Southern Comfort just to chase that Coopers Ale.
And on those cold nights old Granddad would help me make it through.
But I'll be damned if I go home with a Wild Turkey like you!Now I have seen some losers, that would make a statue cry.
But, boy, if you had some feathers, I'd swear that you could fly.
Yes I came in here alone....and yes I've had a few,
But I'll be damned if I go home with a Wild Turkey like you!- Beccy Cole, "Wild Turkey"
Which is not to say that married women, or women who are romantically unavailable for other reasons, aren't a lot of fun. Women are definitely the more interesting and fascinating members of our species. Happily married women are especially fascinating because they have lots of positive feedback from their husbands. I was raised to treat women of all ages with respect and deference, which means that we don't insult them by discriminating against them because their skin is a different shape. Men like me have appointments with other men; we have dates with women, whoever they might be. Men with appointments can split the bill, but on a date the man pays. That's the rule where I come from. It has nothing to do with romance, it has to do with respect and admiration. If a woman insists, I will defer to her sensibilities and treat her like a man by letting her pay her half (or the next time), but I still don't think it's a proper recognition of her femininity. I still have a problem with giving gifts to other men, but a nominal gift to a woman is a way of saying, "I like you," "I respect your femininity," or even "I think you are attractive" without suggesting anything remotely like "I'm trying to get into your pants." Sometimes, however, thanks to changing social mores, what we have is failure to communicate!
The computer dating people believe that romantically compatible people have similar interests. I agree with that. Lovers have to have some similar interests in order to fall in love in the first place, but it's also true that opposites attract! Spouses become interested in similar things over time as a natural result of their lifetime commitment to each other.
Baby it seems we never ever agree.Romance, as I see it, is based on chemistry. If the chemistry ain't right, romance ain't gonna happen! I disagree with the theory that romance is based on similar interests. Friendship is based on similar interests. Love is based on romance. If the chemistry is there, it's wonderful! I have similar interests with the Pope, Norman Schwartzkopf, Burt Rutan, Stephen Hawking, George Bush, John Travolta, and Gandalf the Wizard, but I'm not romantically involved with any of them. People who are intellectually interested in similar things join clubs. People who are romantically interested in each other get married.
You like the movies, and I like T.V.
I take things serious and you take 'em light.
I go to bed early and you party all night.Our friends are sayin' that we ain't gonna last.
Because you move slowly, and baby, I'm fast.
I like it quiet and you love to shout.
But when we get together it just all works out!Who'd a thought we could be lovers?
You make the bed up; baby, I steal the covers.
I like it neat and he makes a mess.
You take it easy; baby, I get obsessed!She's got the money and he's always broke.
I don't like cigarettes and I like to smoke.
Things in common, babe, there just ain't a one.
But when we get together we have nothin' but fun!Baby ain't it somethin' how we lasted this long?
You and me provin' everyone wrong!
Don't think we'll ever get our differences patched.
Don't really matter 'cause we're perfectly matched!I take two steps forward; I take two steps back.
We come together 'cause op-posites attract.
And you know: it ain't fiction, just a natural fact.
We come together 'cause op-posites attract!- Paula Abdul, "Opposites Attract"
My widowed father claimed that he married my stepmother for companionship. I noted that they shared the same bedroom, so there's probably more to that story. My stepmother was my late mother's best friend, so my father probably saw in her many of the same characteristics that attracted him to my mom. One of the characteristics that attracted me to my wife was that she was young and pretty, so there may be some similarity there to my idea of what a wife should be. But I view marriage as way too important and intimate to be entered into just for companionship. If I want companionship, I'll buy a dog.
You know my girl just called me upI can't understand why some people are so consumed with the idea that women and men are equal, or why any woman would ever even consider sinking that low. Of course, few people in the United States today argue that a woman shouldn't have the freedom to do whatever she wants (and is capable of), or that she should be paid differently than a man for the same accomplishments. But men and women are demonstrably, fundamentally different. Women take nine months to bear a child, during much of which time they are understandably clumsy, nauseous, tired and emotional. Men contribute their share in a few seconds (more, of course, if they are considerate and the ladies are lucky). Superman may be more powerful than a locomotive and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, but he's still faster than a speeding bullet, which may (among other considerations, of course) be the reason he doesn't have a girlfriend!
And she woke me from my sleep
You should have heard the things she said
You know she hurt my feelings deep!She used to bring me my newspaper
'Cause she knew where it was at
She used to keep me so contented
But I can't teach a dog to do that!
I'm gonna buy me a dog
'Cause I need a friend now
I'm gonna buy me a dog
My girl, my girl, don't love me nohow!- Hart / Boyce, "Gonna Buy Me A Dog"
Mom may pretend that she can work and raise a child just as well as the homemakers, but one devoted parent, especially one who works full time, cannot possibly do as good a job as two of them, working in harmony together. Somebody has to stay home with the kids and give them their milk, and if it ain't mom, it's a poor substitute. It seems to me, and my Church, that both men and women have a right to the respect and consideration due to their fundamental differences. That's why I voted against the Equal Rights Amendment. Some states passed ERAs of their own, and now they are paying the price. Too bad!
One hundred and one pounds of fun, that's my little Honey Bun!Sexual attraction is one of the many ways in which Almighty God ("Nature" if you like that better) has made it possible to love each other, to live with each other without killing one another. Fifty percent of the human race is of the opposite gender, which makes it easy to love them right off the bat! (Isn't God [Nature] clever?)
Get a load of Honey Bun tonight!
I'm speaking of my sweetie pie, only sixty inches high!
Every inch is packed with dynamite!Her hair is blonde and curly; her curls are hurly-burly.
Her lips are pips!; I call her hips - twirly and whirly!She's my baby; I'm her pap
I'm her booby; she's my trap
I am caught and I don't want to run
'Cause I'm havin' so much fun with Honey Bun!Believe me, sonny,
She's a cookie that can cook you 'till you're doneAin't bein' funny...
You're best to put your money on my Honey Bun!- Oscar Hammerstein, "Honey Bun"
Part of the confusion that resulted from the widespread use of contraceptives was the inclusion in the Civil Rights Act of 1964 (Public Law 88-352, Title VII) of a prohibition against employment discrimination on the basis of sex (actually on the basis of gender, but the inappropriate language was part of the overall hysteria). Prior to the implementation of this law, employers were able to take advantage of natural human instincts and abilities in the selection of workers to perform tasks related to their specific biology. Comforting mother surrogate stewardesses could be employed to make apprehensive airline passengers feel as safe as babes in their mommas' arms. Restaurants could hire mother surrogates to serve food like mom used to back home; municipal fire and police departments could hire father surrogates to come to the rescue of frightened victims. And one of the most basic of human activities, that of providing comfort, nurturing and loving care to sick and frightened people, could be performed in hospitals by people designed by millions of years of evolution for precisely that purpose.
Now all that has changed. Flight attendants, food service personnel, firefighters, police officers and nurses are of both genders, and any employer who even allows nature to seek a balance in the matter is guilty of violating federal law. The official position of the United States Government is that essential difference between men and women are not to be considered in hiring them to do things.
They are not to be considered in deciding who can marry whom, either. The Bible condemns homosexual acts between men, which strongly suggests that "a man ... shall cleave unto his wife" means that the "wife" should be a woman. However, in the United States, at least, civil marriage is a contract between consenting adults that neither requires nor prohibits any act between them other than that involved in getting married in the first place. I have occasionally heard arguments in my church against marriage between men and men or women and woman, but Catholics have had a different view of marriage than many other people for a very long time. We don't expect others to have the same view of The Lord's Supper or ordination of clergy; I don't see that those other's view of what we would call the Sacrament of Matrimony is any of our business unless we live in Vatican City.
While I'm on the subject, I don't find anything in the Bible that forbids one person having multiple spouses, either. For what it's worth, I think that is a Catholic rule and a rule of some other religions, not a Scriptural one. I would be interested in anyone who thinks he has found a Scriptural basis for "only between one man and one woman" to read my comments on the general subject and then possibly to email me and educate me as a work of charity.
An unfortunate result of treating men and women equally is that we have become confused about crimes against sexuality. Big Lie #2 has made its way into the very way we think about rape and child abuse. There aren't any rapists anymore; they're now called sex offenders. We don't say that someone raped and mutilated and terrified and brutalized and tortured and violated a woman, we say he offended her. He didn't steal a little girl's innocence and destroy her psyche and ruin her life; he committed an offense.
Well, lots of things are offensive. Doesn't sound too bad to me. Depends on how you look at things. Some people might be offended, some might not. Depends on the offendee. Kind of like picking your nose at the dinner table. Not unlike farting in church. Maybe the offender needs some counseling. Maybe a little sensitivity training. Reverse role playing might be useful. Can't have people going around offending other people. If they get out of prison, they might offend again! Can't have that! Maybe they should be licensed and registered so people will know who they are. Hey, your neighbor is a registered sex offender. Not just an average, everyday, run of the mill, garden variety sex offender, mind you; a government certified registered sex offender. Maybe they could put out a shingle, like doctors or lawyers. Perhaps we could provide them with GPS tracking devices so we could more easily find them, or publish address books for them on the Internet. Possibly they could advertise on billboards or in little notes in the post office. Maybe we should have special parking places for them. Perhaps they could give out business cards and advertise in the church bulletin!
George Carlin could have had a field day with this!
As an example of the extent this silliness has reached, I recently saw a TV interview with the warden of a "supermax" prison, a place where they keep incorrigibly violent people. The warden referred to them as "offenders." Now, this guy is supposedly educated enough to be trusted with the awesome responsibility of keeping society safe from some of the most dangerous people on the planet, yet he refers to them as "offenders." They are variously; convicts, criminals, inmates, prisoners, or even incarceratees. But offenders? People who pick their noses in public are offenders. Offenders are service people who don't serve, rude people, people who talk on cell phones in restaurants; people with nasty visible tattoos or body piercings; grossly fat people; people who don't bathe! Our society is in very, very deep trouble if it doesn't know the difference between these minor sociopaths and the truly scary people who shoot strangers on the freeway or rape and torture little girls and then bury them while they're still in the process of dying! Wake up, America!
Confusing crimes as offenses also means offenses are now considered crimes. Nowadays, one risks indictment for child molestation if he tells a little boy he looks handsome or a little girl she looks pretty. A guy can get his face slapped for telling a women that he likes her dress. I used to work in a place where you could get fired for saying that! Every male public candidate today has to run a political gauntlet of vindictive women who get off trying to torpedo his campaign, or his tenure in office and deprive the rest of us of his services by claiming that he's a criminal because he purportedly said or did something they didn't like.
They call her Hard-Hearted Hannah, The Vamp Of Savannah.I personally don't consider that someone got raped because she decided afterward that didn't like it or didn't get paid enough. Rape is a crime of violence like aggravated battery. If it wasn't forced or accomplished by pretense, it wasn't rape, unless the victim was a minor. Then it was rape, regardless of consent. Even if it was rape, one is not considered guilty of a crime in the United States unless he has been convicted of one. A long time ago one could assume that if a man had sexual relations with a woman he wasn't married to, he had raped her, but those days are gone forever. I am going to assume, absent overwhelming evidence to the contrary, that anyone old enough to consent did precisely that. Asking for money, promotions or other favors for sex is prostitution, which it is the function of courts to discourage, not promote. It is certainly not the function of the courts to make somebody a millionaire from one rich "john" just because he's important or wealthy and she's an amateur whore.
The meanest gal in town;
Leather is tough, but Hannah's heart is tougher;
She's a gal who loves to see men suffer!To tease 'em and thrill 'em, to torture and kill 'em,
Is her delight, they say.
I saw her at the seashore with a great big pan,
There was Hannah pourin' water on a drowning man,
She's Hard-Hearted Hannah, The Vamp Of Savannah, GA- Jack Yellen, Milton Ager, Bob Bigelow & Charles Bates, "Hard-Hearted Hannah"
Lawyer - "Now, Ms. X, let me see if I've got this right. You claim that in the practice of your profession, and without any sort of a bodyguard at all, you freely and voluntarily entered a private residence in which a large number of horny teenage boys had been drinking heavily for a long period of time..."By the way, unless there is a specific law against it where it takes place, "touching" is not a crime. "Groping" is not a crime. "Fondling" is not a crime. "Ogling" is not a crime! Battery is a crime! Assault is a crime! Rape is a crime! Not "groping." You show me a woman who complains publicly that somebody "groped" her and I'll show you a sexually frustrated whiner! If somebody "groped" you (and you didn't like it), avoid him (or her) from now on! Next case!
Witness - "Yessir, and they was all rich white college boys, too."
Lawyer - "Yes, and then you started gyrating provocatively and seductively removing your clothes..."
Witness - "Yessir. I got them rich white college boys all hot to trot!"
Lawyer - "And you claim that you were subsequently raped?"
Witness - "Oh, yessir! Them rich white college boys all raped me real bad! And they called me and my friend a racial slur, too!"
Lawyer - "Tell me, does this happen to you often?"
Other Lawyer - "Objection, your honor! Ms. X's past victimization is not relevant."
Lawyer - "OK, I'll rephrase that. What did you think would happen?"
Other Lawyer - "Objection! Calls for speculation on the part of the witness!"
Lawyer - "Let me rephrase that again. WERE YOU FREAKING CRAZY?"
Other Lawyer - "YOUR HONOR!"
Lawyer - "No further questions......"
Face it; a person commits a crime by doing something that is against the law, as determined by a trial and a jury of his or her peers, not by doing something somebody else finds offensive. We voters, men and women, have the ability through our legislatures to determine what the law is and how it is applied. But someone indicted for a crime is innocent until proven guilty. In a nation ruled by laws, one doesn't do something wrong just because someone else thinks it was, even if the one accused actually did it.
My personal opinion is that it is a complement to us men for a woman to spend time and effort to make herself look sexually attractive, that it is a complement to them for us to acknowledge that they are, and that we appreciate all their efforts to make themselves that way. The ladies are free to disagree with me on this, of course, but I would ask them to consider the intent of the complement rather than be offended for reasons which I am not likely to understand. I admit I have NO idea why "I like to watch you walk" is an insult, let alone criminal sexual harassment.
No doubt I could use some sensitivity training!
Come with me on a voyage of discov'ry; a universe of countless stars, so very far from home.The standards for sexual compatibility have been worked out through millions of years of evolution and social custom. I can't really know personally how women view men, but I do know that it is not good for us men to be alone because, in addition to my personal experience, the Bible tells me so. The greatest gift we human beings have been given in this life is the singular faculty by which nature, in her infinite generosity, bestows the blessings of immortality upon our frail race.
Take my hand, and with my love to sustain you, eternally, you'll never be alone.
Worlds of wonderment and high fantasy; together, unbounded, our spirits may roam, oh...
Take my hand, and all my love to sustain you, until we take that final voyage home.- me, "Star Trek, Voyager"
It's called:
Sex.